{"id":16,"date":"2019-09-10T19:11:00","date_gmt":"2019-09-10T19:11:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/cherylrostek.com\/index.php\/2019\/09\/10\/sept-10-gratitude-what-cancer-cannot-steal\/"},"modified":"2019-09-19T19:59:14","modified_gmt":"2019-09-19T19:59:14","slug":"sept-10-gratitude-what-cancer-cannot-steal","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/cherylrostek.com\/index.php\/2019\/09\/10\/sept-10-gratitude-what-cancer-cannot-steal\/","title":{"rendered":"Sept 10 Gratitude: What cancer cannot steal"},"content":{"rendered":"<div>&lt;&lt;Sept 10 Gratitude&gt;&gt; What cancer cannot steal.<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>Yesterday my husband, Ryan\u2019s, van was broken into.&nbsp; The thieves smashed his window and stole his backpack.&nbsp; They stole his backpack containing his laptop, essential for his business, perhaps a little bit of cash, and a stack of my \u201cbusiness cards\u201d that Ryan likes to hand out.&nbsp; As I was messaging my friend this morning to report my gratitude for today I said, \u201cits one of those ARRRRGGGGHHHH!!!! Kinda things: why? WHY? WHY???!!\u201d So little use for the thief (the laptop was actually on its last leg), yeah a bit of cash, but a HUGE inconvenience for Ryan: having to retrieve his files, replace his computer, get a new backpack, and fix the van window.&nbsp; It feels so pointless, what a pointless crime!<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>As I take time to process my anger I find sadness as well.&nbsp; It seems silly, but that backpack was a gift I gave Ryan close to 15 years ago.&nbsp; He has used it regularly ever since.&nbsp; My husband is the hardest guy to a present for.&nbsp; I remember driving all over Saskatoon to find a laptop backpack for him.&nbsp; I found a good one, (and he didn\u2019t try to return it!) and he\u2019s been using it for years.&nbsp; Today I sit in my sadness that his backpack, and what that signifies, is stolen, gone.<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>Anger.&nbsp; Today I am angry that these thieves stole from us, what was not theirs.&nbsp; Anger is not one of my common emotions and I find that it usually points to a deeper emotion within me.&nbsp; As I let myself sit in my anger it surfaces.&nbsp; The pointlessness of it all precipitates thoughts like these, (Oh they are ugly\u2026) \u201cWhy did I get the cancer, why don\u2019t people like these thieves get their lives interrupted and shortened with cancer?!\u201d&nbsp; These angry questions lead further to ones I don\u2019t think I\u2019ve really even asked yet:&nbsp; &nbsp;\u201cWHY me!? Why did I get this nasty cancer??!!!&nbsp; I was a thriving member of society, a medical professional, a mom of three young children, in my prime!&nbsp; Why me, God? Why me???!!!!\u201d&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>It makes no sense, it makes me angry and sad all mixed together.&nbsp; Historically, I avoid allowing myself to feel these difficult emotions.&nbsp; I put up a stony shield of indifference, a sort of \u201cthey can\u2019t hurt me!\u201d kind of attitude.&nbsp; However, this past year I have learned from Brene Brown, that if I numb pain (by forging a stony shield of indifference to the hurt), I will also numb joy.&nbsp; I don\u2019t know about you, but I will take all the joy I can get.&nbsp; So it is good to sit in the anger and the pain for a moment.<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>But only for a moment.&nbsp; (How long is a moment? I imagine it depends on the hurt \u2013 when I was first diagnosed with glioblastoma, my counselor told me that it was okay to sit in my sadness,grief, anger etc. of my diagnosis for 1 week.&nbsp; After that, she said, I needed to employ measures to process and move forward.)<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>Yesterday when Ryan\u2019s car was broken into he was with a group of people, each one of them with their own story of their own car being broken into.&nbsp; For me that was a reminder that we\u2019re all in this life together.&nbsp; We\u2019ve all had something stolen from us.&nbsp; This gave me perspective.&nbsp; And it pushed me forward.&nbsp; Because to sit asking, \u201cWhy me?!\u201d is like being a car stuck in the mud spinning it\u2019s wheels, going nowhere, and sending muck flying in all directions.&nbsp; So instead of asking the question without an answer, \u201cWhy me?\u201d I choose to focus instead on what I can control.&nbsp; As I practice gratitude I remember that I can control my perspective.&nbsp; &nbsp;&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>I am reminded of the poem \u201cWhat Cancer Cannot Do\u201d that my dear friend sent to me when I was first diagnosed with Glioblastoma.&nbsp; It was eyeopenning and a perspective shifter.<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a href=\"http:\/\/cherylrostek.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/what-cancer-cannot-do-500x737-257E2.jpg\" style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\"><img decoding=\"async\" border=\"0\" data-original-height=\"737\" data-original-width=\"500\" height=\"400\" src=\"http:\/\/cherylrostek.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/what-cancer-cannot-do-500x737-257E2-204x300.jpg\" width=\"271\" \/><\/a><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>In light of yesterday\u2019s events I frame that poem as \u201cWhat Cancer Cannot Steal From Me.\u201d And I remember that cancer CANNOT steal and these thieves CANNOT steal love, friendship, hope, peace, joy, and contentment from me!<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>I find scripture to be very encouraging and helpful in maintaining the perspective I desire.&nbsp; I\u2019ve been reading these words of a guy named Paul in the bible.&nbsp; He speaks about the importance of a joy that can always be found.&nbsp; He speaks that he has learned the secret of how to get along happily with much or with little.&nbsp; He speaks about thinking about things that are praise-worthy.&nbsp; It sounds a lot like this gratitude journey I\u2019ve been invited on.<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>Gratitude is thinking about matters that are praise-worthy&#8212; in times of much and in times of little.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>The reward of gratitude? A joy that cannot be stolen.<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>Let\u2019s sit with THAT for longer than a moment!&nbsp; Always remembering what cancer CANNOT steal, what thieves CANNOT steal!<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>I will close with an invitation.&nbsp; I invite you into this journey with me, whatever your journey looks like.&nbsp; Whether you have cancer, know someone with cancer, or cancer hasn\u2019t really touched your life.&nbsp; &nbsp;Whether spirituality is a part of your life or not.&nbsp; Whether you believe in God, the power of the universe, other faith-based beliefs, or you\u2019re not sure.&nbsp; I invite you into this journey with me asking for grace as I speak from the voice (and acknowledged bias) of my own personal faith and grace as I seek to understand other faiths and belief systems more clearly.&nbsp; Regardless of the paths of our journeys, I strongly feel that we are all better journeying together.&nbsp; (Remember I shared that it is only because of the invitation of my dear friend that I am on this deepened gratitude journey&#8212; and oh how thankful for that I am!)&nbsp; I sincerely thank you for journeying with me.<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>XOXO<\/div>\n<div>Cheryl&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&lt;&lt;Sept 10 Gratitude&gt;&gt; What cancer cannot steal. Yesterday my husband, Ryan\u2019s, van was broken into.&nbsp; The thieves smashed his window and stole his backpack.&nbsp; They stole his backpack containing his laptop, essential for his business, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":235,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-16","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Sept 10 Gratitude: What cancer cannot steal - Cheryl Rostek<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/cherylrostek.com\/index.php\/2019\/09\/10\/sept-10-gratitude-what-cancer-cannot-steal\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Sept 10 Gratitude: What cancer cannot steal - Cheryl Rostek\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"&lt;&lt;Sept 10 Gratitude&gt;&gt; What cancer cannot steal. 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